Feminism

Limited period: One day offer for increasing the life span of your husband!

 

*Conditions Applied.

Ladies, do you LOVE your husbands?

Then for you, and only you, we have a limited time, one day offer to increase the life span of your husband!!!

Do not eat for one day and help us deal with our competition, the God of Food, by totally ignoring him for one whole day, and in return we will increase your husband’s life!

Please read the FAQ section below for more details.

So, come all decked in your newest saris and fast for your Gods!

Love,
God, Almighty

 

FAQ Section:

Q. What about my lifespan?
A. Oh come on! Who cares about your life? Your life is good only till your husband lives. So you better hope he lives for a long long time.

Q. Umm..ok..so how does this even work?
A. By forgetting all the science classes you ever took.

Q. But, it is so romantic to fast for the one you love, isn’t it?
A. Yes, so true. Showing your love and care by doing things to make another person happy, make them feel loved and respected by words or actions throughout the year, is just not done. One needs to show love by sacrificing, compromising and whole other ‘ings’. Also, might I suggest ways of showing your love by writing a letter from your own blood, telling other person you love them so much you would kill yourself if they ever leave?

Q. But he will fast for me as well, isnt he so cute?
A. Owwwwhands on the heart, wipes a tear.. Indeed, you are so lucky, to have someone who, instead of telling you not to put yourself through discomfort, would rather put himself through discomfort as well!! How wonderfully logical husband you got! Lucky you!

Q. But, it is traditional, traditions should be followed as they are our a part of our wonderful culture!
A. Indeed it is, and let’s totally forget that this day was marked to celebrate a new bride’s friendship with other females (who are not her in-laws) when she reaches her husband’s place, but let us follow everything others tell us blindly without questioning or researching, and follow traditions that were not there in the first place! After all, who has time for knowing our culture, when one can just shout ‘respect our culture’ and do what others do! :)
Oh, and while we are honoring patriarchy let’s bring back Sati, Doodhpiti as well, they were a part of culture that started around the same time Karva Chauth started being about men’s life span instead of female friendships!

Peace!

(This post was also published here)

Check out my last year’s post on the Importance of Karva Chauth here.

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2 thoughts on “Limited period: One day offer for increasing the life span of your husband!”

  1. See wife’s duty is to serve her husbands so if she dies the husband has every right to marry another woman half his age to serve him and to have sex with. So your life is not as important as his, after all why should servants be given long life. That is why there is no specific Karva chauth/Rakshabandhan for men.
    Women on the other hand you can do sex only with one man in your life and that too only if he wants it (or whenever he wants it). Your personality and dignity lies in your virginity once you lost that then you are finished.
    So if you want a happy life pray for your man’s long life. Even he is concerned about his life and happiness and it lies with your fasting, if you don’t do it then don’t cry if he force feed you with phenol or Kerosene.
    Otherwise plan on becoming somebody’s trophy or puppet, it is after all our culture.

    Like

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